Diary of a glamper
It’s all about the excess, dahling….
Ah, the life of a glamper. If you’re going to do camping, then glamping is the only way to go. And as I always say, the only stars I sleep under are five-stars.
My good friends Tracey and Des thought I needed some clean air, starry skies and blue morning horizons, so they decided they would take me camping. But my friends do things in style so cue no struggling with the equipment and no eating of freeze-dried space food...
Start with your ‘glam rig’ – that is, either a luxury Range Rover + T Van (an upmarket trailer/caravan) or, if you’re near Sai Kung, the fanciest tenting equipment on the market. You need all the latest kit to give you hot and cold running water; the best food; a miniature wine fridge and a pillow-top-queen-sized ensemble!
The perfect spot is somewhere away from bugs and moths but close enough to the trees with an open sky view – so as to catch a smog-free night of stars and a full moon rising. You’ll need ample room to prepare and cook your food too.
We start the evening with fresh salmon, tuna sashimi and Californian rolls with a blended soy and wasabi as an entrée, and icy Verve Clicquot as the sun sinks and the moon rises.
Our main course consists of a roasted, de-boned leg of lamb stuffed with rosemary, garlic and olive oil served with roasted Dutch creamed potatoes, roasted pumpkin and sweet potatoes, steamed broccoli and minted snow peas accompanied by handmade gravy from the juices. If you’re going to go glamping, then you want your food to be as good (if not better) than an upmarket restaurant.
All this is washed down with two bottles of double-decanted Cabernet Sauvignon. Dessert is cinnamon dumplings cooked in a golden syrup glaze with a Clare Valley Botrytis Semillon.
Lastly, a perfect night’s sleep with a clear evening sky and the faint sound of soft running water. One must dream in style.
In the morning, breakfast is truffle scrambled eggs cooked over an open fire and crispy bacon with freshly made Australian damper (flour and water) before setting off on a hike through the hills. My only recommendation to would-be glampers is don’t wear your Havaianas flip-flops when walking over rocks... the rocks always win.
And even though I dislocate my knee while out glamping and can’t walk for a few hours, I am actually more worried about the fact that I have lost my new US$300 sunglasses, so have to enlist the help of the men to scour the ground. Some 20 minutes later my sunnies are found lodged between two rocks. As I said, the rocks always win. Donna Campbell