Is checking your iPhone at the table impolite? How about wiping your baby’s bottom before the main arrives? David Tamarkin asked restaurateurs their views on every eatery no-no 
 

Despite knowing basic etiquette, many people still don’t follow the rules of standard restaurant behaviour. And when we recently heard from a restaurant owner about an increase in unsavoury behaviour by customers, we wondered what the rules actually are concerning mobile phones, iPhones, laptops, tissues, and creams. To get some answers we polled some chefs and restaurateurs around town about the current state of in-house etiquette, and were able to piece together some new rules about what one ought not to do when dining.

OFFENCE #1 Customers bring their own coffee (or bottled water) to brunch
"I’m appalled by the number of people who walk into the restaurant with commercial coffee,” one restaurateur said, echoing the sentiments of the rest of the group. But while some make a point to ask about the coffee (“Are you finished with that?”), none felt they could ask the customer to throw the coffee away.
VERDICT Impolite, but you’ll get away with it.

OFFENCE #2 Diners have a full-blown meeting at the restaurant, complete with laptops
Restaurants that serve breakfast and lunch seemed more open to the idea of meetings, saying that not only are they fine with it, they often accommodate for the extra space. But at dinner it was another story. “It is never appropriate to pull out laptops at the table. You are in a restaurant to eat. Business should be finished elsewhere,” said one owner.
VERDICT Perfectly acceptable in some situations, so call ahead to check.

OFFENCE #3 Customers text, surf and play games on their phones through–out their meal
Few of the industry folks polled had any problem with the silent use of iPhones, saying that the only time they would object is if the phone was making a noise. Still, one owner pointed out that “it is a bit bothersome when you are delivering food and want to quickly explain the item and guests continue with their texting/surfing.” Another owner observed that “a table of two will be eating, one gets up to go to the restroom. The other immediately pulls out a phone and starts texting. It’s like people can’t wait to get away from each other to communicate electronically.”
VERDICT Text sparingly.

OFFENCE #4 Changing a baby’s diaper at the table
"I've seen a mother change her baby’s diaper and leave it for the staff to clean up. It’s not against the law, but it is not classy,” said one restaurant manager. If a restaurant doesn’t offer a bathroom big enough to lay your baby down, they should be able to find you a private area.
VERDICT Mums and dads, get a room.

OFFENCE #5 Clearing your plate, then telling the waitstaff that there's something wrong with your food
Most restaurants will be happy to oblige if the dish not something you want to eat. “Sometimes people just make the wrong choices not because the food is bad, but we change it anyway. We want to keep our customers happy,” said one insider. But if it is half eaten then you can’t say you didn’t like it and then ask for it to be taken off your bill and expect free dessert. “Two or three bites should tell you if you like it or not.”
VERDICT If it doesn’t taste right, say so within the first few bites. The staff will likely replace it or take it off the bill, nothing more.

AND ANOTHER THING... Restaurateurs’ gives us their pet peeves

We asked the restaurateurs to vent about issues we didn’t bring up, and they had no shortage of concerns. “The item that I find the most problematic is reservations,” said one. “Flat out, people don’t care and don’t honour them.” For another, the issue was misbehaving dogs – or, rather, misbehaving dog owners. “Last year a really big dog threw up [on our patio]…the owners did nothing. Didn’t tell us. No offer to clean up.” Yet another restaurateur asked about people who bring their own dessert. “When did it become okay to arrive with your own cake? Would anyone consider coming in with his own pork chop or piece of salmon?”

Additional reporting by Angie Wong.